Wednesday, January 2, 2008

From Weak to Strong






A Journey to Recovery: Through a Teens

It all began in my first year of high school. Going to a school that was a couple towns over from my hometown I was introduced to a new family or crowd of warm - filled loving people, with many different diversities. This was very new to me as during my pre-graduate school ( Grades 1 to 8 ) I had become close to everyone and built many strong relationships. So in the end me being brought to this new school changed started my life over in a sort of way. I would have to start over and begin to make new friends and build newer and stronger relationships.

During my freshman year of high school in Manchester, Connecticut my life at school was switching everyday. Instead of focusing on my school work and grades, I was more into trying to fit in and making new friends. So basically I was jumping from click to click to see which group I admired the most. I'm sure everyone in today's world understands what I was trying to do. I was basically trying to find the right place to fit in.

I was very shy at this point in my life. I was the student that tried to fit in but could never find the right crowd. Well as the year went on I found myself stumbling upon the click or crowd known as the "class clown." I would find myself making cracks at the teacher or anyone I could to make others laugh. This intrigued me. I began to create a group. This was my place of being and I started to grow in popularity. Many people wanted to get to know me. Girls where interested in me and I was becoming the center of attention. My life was great.

About half way through my freshman year I found myself getting into trouble almost everyday and ending up in the principles office for many stupid judgements. Now that I am older and look back on the foolish judgements I made, I can see how immature I was. Everything I did was a complete joke. And for what? Was it the attention? To get in trouble? I was starting to become an out of control teenager.

It was now the summer of 2004. Every summer my brothers and I would travel down to Niantic, Connecticut and visit my grandparents who lived in a small community called Black Point. I started my summer off where I left it the previous year. I started going around and gathering all my friends up that I had made in the previous years and went to the beach to go swimming. I didn't know at the time that this summer was going to be the first turning point in my life.

It was about half-way through the summer and my friends introduced me to alcohol and smoking marijuana. This was new to me because I had never been introduce to this kind of behavior in my life. I started to begin drinking and smoking everyday because I liked the way it made my body feel. Believe it or not I developed a problem. I also picked up the habit of smoking cigarettes, which I still continue to use today. Back to the story I was completely out of control. Getting into worse trouble than I already was at school but now i was introduce doing it on the streets. i was not only hurting myself but the people around me who only did it occasionally. That wasn't me I had to do it everyday or I wouldn't be happy. I couldn't live without some alter state of mind, the "high."

It was not long before my grandparents would catch on and start grounding me from everything. That didn't stop me. I found myself sneaking out after they would go to sleep and drinking until the early morning and then coming home just before they would wake and make it look like I was sleeping all night. That was my last summer down there because of the decisions I had made.

That brings me to the start of my sophomore year. I knew you really couldn't get away with drinking at school but could I use marijuana and get away with it? I found myself now smoking before school just to get high and go to school every single day, just for the feeling of being high. I found myself skipping lunch just to go outside and smoke and get high. I had grown into a bigger habit now. I stopped using alcohol and began using marijuana because I could control my high unlike the alcohol high. I began to smoke at least 3 to 4 times a day. It was now about the time when my parents started to catch on to what I was doing and also about the time my dad took off to live somewhere else away from the family. I found out later on that he had an uncontrollable drug problem and was very high into it. This made me very upset to see my own father run out of my life for drugs, while stealing half of my mothers belongings and all his valued goods to pawn them off to shops for drugs. I didn't want to live life anymore. I was very very unstable.

About four months later my dad was in rehab and came out doing just fine. It was nice to have my father back in my life and to be clean. It was coming up the summer of 2005 and over the summer a girl came into my life who would change everything. She knew about my drug use and gave me an alternative. I would have to stop smoking marijuana and stop drinking. I went through 3 weeks of hell and feeling sick and throwing up all the time everyday and it was a feeling I never wanted to have in my life again. I also gave up smoking cigarettes at this time and that also made me sicker because I had no nicotine in my system. This was the first relationship that would actually mean everything to me. It was because of this girl pushing me to stop. Eleven months into the relationship I found out that she had cheated on my several times and that she no longer cared for me. This meant that everything I put myself through and everything I had done for her was all for nothing. And it all happened way to fast, out of the blue, I had no idea that the break-up was coming. I began to start smoking and drinking again.

It was now senior year and I was introduced to cocaine and partying hardcore. This was the new life for me. Going out with friends and partying and running from the cops all for fun. Later on during the year I stepped up from using cocaine to using heroine. I never imagined in my life that I would be using this drug. I was addicted and strung out on this drug. My life was still changing everyday. My mother caught on to my drug abuse because of the way my behavior was changing and from past experience with my father. My brother followed me in this drug abuse and became addicted himself. I ruined my whole senior year and the following summer because all I wanted to do was get high. It was not until I realized what I was doing to my body and the people around me and many programs and hearing stories about people who have lost their lives doing drugs and that finally gave me the power to consider stopping the drug abuse.

I tried everything to stop using and finally found enough power to stop. I now see that I really messed up my whole high school life and I can't go back and change what I did. I really wish there was a way I could but not in today's world. I am currently 3 months clean and wish to stay that way. With the power of Jesus Christ my Savior and the power of my family I am currently on a path to never again using drugs.

There are many different programs and support groups that you may get involved in if you have a problem or family members or even friends that are using, that you may join to help you get through the hard times. Contact me via email at Caldon.h6770@sbcglobal.net if you need someone to talk to or more information about these programs.

I have read a few books that helped me in the step to recovery. You can find these books at your local bookstore or online. You can also receive these books by your group leader or sponsor if you are in a Recovery Program like Al-Anon or Narcotics Anonymous. Here is the list:



  1. NA - It Works How and Why - The 12 Steps and 12 Traditions of Narcotics Anonymous

  2. One Day at a Time in Al-Anon

  3. Courage to Change - One day at a time in Al-Anon II

I will now list a few programs that I myself are involved in and they have worked for me and I can guaranteed that they will work for you. All you have to be is willing to recover. Here's the list:




  • The Addiction Free Forever Program : A complete at-home addiction recovery program that permanently and naturally cures an alcohol or drug addiction. For more information on this proven step-by-step recovery program visit the following website: http://bcaldon08.ultimateps.hop.clickbank.net/





  • The Ultimate Cannabis Stop! System - a complete system with three modules designed to teach you about your habit, help you to understand your addiction, and best of all... give you the tools to stop smoking weed and move on with your life! For more information on this proven system click on the following link : http://bcaldon08.cannabis.hop.clickbank.net/





  • Guide to Affordable Drug Rehab and Addiction Treatment - Get into rehab, Even With No Money! No Insurance? No Problem! Everyone Can Check Into Rehab, And With 1,500 Free Or Almost Free Drug And Alcohol Rehabs Waiting To Help You Across The Nation, You Can Always Get Into Rehab. More info on this guide? Visit : http://bcaldon08.choosehelp.hop.clickbank.net/








These are not fake! They honestly work, no strings attached don't miss out on very easy steps to become ADDICTION FREE !!!



Remember the First Step.
"We admitted that we were powerless over our
addiction, that our lives had become unmanageable."



Its now up to you! You now have the power to choose whether you want to live a clean and happy life or to continue wasting your life because of an addiction.



I really hope this has changed your life in someway!
Contact me if I can be of any help.
My email again is:
Caldon.h6770@sbcglobal.net



Copyright 2008
All Rights Reserved



Bryan Caldon







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